Saturday, January 29, 2011
can't you tell i'm faking: this air iz so thick &lonely ♥ - 3:58am
i don't know what to write, i guess i just know i should write something. this can only resuly in something short and detached.
i met so many people this week&it has gone so quickly,, it says a lot about sitting alone for days on end.
i start back in college on monday &i can feel my mind flickering different cadences, though most of them are positive ♥ college is so bland&i feel an immediate disinterest towards everyone there- it's a sin!
i always seem to end up in Stephen's Green alone? your mind is a mess when you're nostalgic and hopeful/reading melancholic poetry is slowly obliterating the certainty that i'll ambulate grey concrete for the rest of my life- sitting behind frail stems verging blurs of green. reading dreamy novels about running away ♥
it's 4:28am- maybe next week in college won't be so different afterall?
'Relentless walls! whose darksome round contains
Repentant sighs, and voluntary pains:
Ye rugged rocks! which holy knees have worn;
Ye grots and caverns shagg'd with horrid thorn!
Shrines! where their vigils pale-ey'd virgins keep,
And pitying saints, whose statues learn to weep!
Though cold like you, unmov'd, and silent grown,
I have not yet forgot myself to stone.
All is not Heav'n's while Abelard has part,
Still rebel nature holds out half my heart;
Nor pray'rs nor fasts its stubborn pulse restrain,
Nor tears, for ages, taught to flow in vain.'
- Eloisa to Abelard is sickly beautiful.